In honor of Saint Nicholas, who happens to be the patron saint of brewers, I present ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas, Beer Edition. Have a beery merry Christmas, and a hoppy New Year!
‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Everyone enjoyed craft beers, even my spouse;
The bottles were arranged in the fridge with care
In honor of those who had brewed it with flair.
The party was cooling off, starting to chill
When the crowd jumped up: someone’s beer did spill;
The Russian imperial stout’s strength was the cause
My cousin had chugged it: drinking without pause.
When in the driveway there arose such a clatter
My friend burst in and asked “What’s the matter?”
He grabbed a towel, raced over in a flash
And within moments, had wiped up that splash.
The moon on the breast of his craft beer shirt
Gave us all pause. Had he brought beer dessert?
We rushed to the window to look out at his car
Kegs and bottles flashed in the night like a star.
Now IPAs, now stouts, now lagers and ales
On porters, on Belgians, a great brew never fails;
From the trunk of the car, to the top of the glass
The beers were delicious: they were brewed with class.
The party started rockin’, for we all had fresh beer
With Buzzards Bay and Mayflower, we didn’t have to fear;
Sam Adams, Clown Shoes, Berkshire’s beer too
Goodfellows, Berkley, they all make great brew.
Cape Cod’s beers were there, with ales golden, and red
We had so much beer, we could fill up a sled;
T’was poured into glasses, so we could get the aroma
When allowed to breathe, beer likes to foam-a.
We had Jack’s Abbey’s Mass Rising, a very strong lager
It was so delicious, I started to hog-her;
But quickly I realized that I was being rude
I needed to share, or others would brood.
I cracked open another, and started to pour
Let everyone taste it, t’is what friends are for;
Eyes lit up as they tasted the hop bite
But with the sweet flavors, the balance was right.
Someone cracked open Vermont’s Heady Topper
My friend grabbed it and ran, somebody stop her!
It’s an a-maz-ing brew, so deliciously flavored
Of course she stopped, shared, and then we all savored.
The party wound down, we had run out of beer!
It’s every party hosts’ nightmare, their very worst fear;
The guests filtered out, headed off into the night
Drivers were sober, we knew to party right.
As I watched them all leave, I began to ponder
What will come of the future, in the days of yonder?
Will craft beer continue it’s amazing surge
Or will it consolidate, will breweries merge?
For now, there’s so many New England brews
When standing in the store, it’s real hard to choose;
Drink Mass, Vermont, Rhode Island, or try Maine?
The beers from Connecticut and NH are also insane.
It all tastes so good, we’re in a great beer era
Could be stuck in the 70s, that bad brew terror;
Breweries are popping up on the left, on the right
Every day a new beer maker’s dream sees the light.
Don’t forget important thing about holiday drinking
Safety is something that we all should be thinking;
Drunk driving’s no joke, let’s keep everyone alive
If you drive, don’t drink, and if you drink, don’t drive.
Originally published on December 20, 2013